Headline DS #63 - Obama Seeks $84B in War Funds

"Obama Seeks $84B in War Funds" is from the April 10, 2009 edition of the Express. I'm not surprised by the price. The wars in Afghanistan and Iran should be funded. But where is the money going to come from? Distributed by Tubemogul.

Headline DS #62 - Piracy Thrives in Lawless Somalia

"Piracy Thrives in Lawless Somalia" is from the April 9, 2009 edition of the Express. In the new millennium you expect certain jobs to be obsolete, door-to-door salesman, slide rule technician, pirate. But piracy is going strong in Somalia which apparently has no central government. In 2008, 42 vessels were jacked by pirates. Turns out piracy is good for the local economy as pirates spend money in the local towns. Distributed by Tubemogul.

Headline DS #61 - Ban on Photos of War Dead Ends

"Ban on Photos of War Dead Ends" is from the April 7, 2009 edition of the Express. No attempt at a cute punchline today. After 18 years, the Pentagon has lifted the ban on media releasing casket photos of returning soldiers killed over seas. The decision is now left up to the families as it always should have been. Distributed by Tubemogul.

HeadlineDS #60 - Porn Screening at UMd. Back On

"Porn Screening at UMd. Back On" is from the April 6, 2009 edition of the Express. In defiance of some at the MD State Senate, students at the University of Maryland at College Park have rented a lecture hall to screen the pirate porn movie that was canceled Saturday night. Sure, it's not the same as protesting a war. But it's good to see students standing up for porn... I mean free speech. Distributed by Tubemogul.

Healine DS #59 - UMd. Cancels Porn Movie Event

"UMd. Cancels Porn Movie Event" is from the April 3, 2009 edition of the Express. This is pretty stupid. The Maryland State Senate threatened to cut off UMD's funding if they showed a porn movie parody of Pirates of the Caribbean entitled Pirates XXX. Yes, UMD is a state run school. But it's not like they were forcing anyone to pay money for a ticket. Man, why is everyone afraid of a little skin? Okay, a lot of skin.

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Headline DS #58 - GOP Offers Up Alternative Budget

"GOP Offers Up Alternative Budget" is from the April 2, 2009 edition of the Express. Sorry guys, but eight years of tax cuts for businesses and the wealthy inspired little more than corporate greed and helped land us in the mess. Cutting taxes in the middle of a freaking war? That's pretty short sighted. Sorry GOP, no one's listening to your broken record anymore. Distributed by Tubemogul.

Headline DS #57 - GM's CEO: Bankruptcy is Possible

"GM's CEO: Bankruptcy is Possible" is from the April 1, 2009 edition of the Express. I'm kind of curious as to why the administration didn't take a similar tactic with the banking and financial industries as it has with the auto industry. Fire the CEO, give them a month to come up with a plan, threaten bankruptcy. Rinse and repeat. I guess it's too late to do the same for the financial industry, but it'd certainly feel good to see some bank CEOs get the chopping block.

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